Snakepit Fake Film Trailer

Another fake film trailer courtesy of Keith...

This one is for "Snakepit: A Stargate/Draka Crossover," another piece of fan-fiction I enjoy.  I found it on my alternate-history forum and was also posted on some other fora I'm less familiar with (I think stardestroyer.net and spacebattles.org).

Basically, the minor Goa'uld Kar'lac and his badly-damaged ship arrive in the Solar System a decade after the Draka win the Final War.  The Draka fend him off and in the process discover the Stargate.  The Draka version of SG-1, under the command of Anton de Polignac sets out to explore and eventually conquer the galaxy.  Along for the ride is a Draka version of Daniel Jackson.  "Snakepit" and a couple of minor stories have been completed and posted on fanfiction.net, but the sequel "Stars of Iron" is on hiatus due to the author being busy in real life.  He thinks he'll get back to though.

I blogged about "Snakepit" a lot in the past, but neglected to post the film trailer.  Here it is, for your entertainment...

EXT: SPACE

(Camera pans down to the Earth)

Narrator: In a world...

(Camera zooms in, showing ice covering many temperate regions and numerous battlestations and spacecraft orbiting overhead)

Narrator: ...where things turned out...

MONTAGE SEQUENCE

(An animated, coloured worldmap labelled '1942' shows Africa and the Middle East as a solid block of orange. Arrows lance out from the swastika-marked German Reich into Russia, then additional arrows move out from the orange block to encircle the Axis forces.)

(Draka paratroopers descend from the sky into Georgia.)

(Draka Citizens fight SS troopers with horrifying efficiency in the ruins of a village)

Archon (V/O): The Draka will conquer the world for two reasons; because we must and because we can.

(Janissary jackboots stomp across a fallen Nazi flag. Pan up to reveal the ruins of Berlin.)

Narrator: ...a little differently...

(The worldmap, now labelled '1948', shows all of Africa and Eurasia save Britain, India, Japan and SE Asia in orange, with the rest in blue. The two blocks are labelled 'Domination of the Draka' and 'Alliance for Democracy'.)

(Nuclear mushroom clouds and kinetic explosions engulf familiar cities and landmarks in a rapid-fire sequence.)

(The worldmap, now labelled '1998', turns entirely orange.)

(The Draka flag is raised over the ruins of New York City.)

EXT: SPACE

(A pyramidal starship emerges from hyperspace, obviously damaged, and engages Draka weapon platforms.)

Narrator: An ancient menace is about to return.

INT: TOMB

(The camera rapidly follows Karl'ac and a group of Jaffa down a corridor, then lingers as they halt in front of a Stargate.)

Narrator: And they haven't the faintest idea what's about to hit them.

(The Jaffa are mown down like cattle by heavy machine-gun fire, then a squad of ghouloons lope into the middle of the group and tear the survivors apart.)

INT: DANTE BASE

(Anton de Polignac and his squad, massive and heavily armed in their power armour, stand before the Stargate as it opens.)

Anton de Polignac: Service to the State!

MONTAGE SEQUENCE

(Draka tanks engage Jaffa on a dusty street.)

(A Draka missile obliterates a Goa'uld outpost.)

(A Ha'tak explodes.)

(Anton de Polignac's boot crushes a Goa'uld symbiote.)

Anton de Polignac (V/O): Glory to the race!

TITLE SCREEN

DARK SCHTROUMPF PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS

IN ASSOCIATION WITH ALTERNATEHISTORY.ORG

SNAKEPIT

THIS FALL

THE FUTURE JUST GOT R-RATED

MONTAGE SEQUENCE

(Two naked female Drakensis enthusiastically make out in a tent - we mostly just see their faces and the bare back of one of them.)

(de Polignac snaps someone's neck.)

(A Tollan woman screams in ecstasy at something we can't see. Daniel Jackson moves into view.)

(Jaffa stare in horror at a display of impaled corpses.)

(A space station explodes with gigatons of force.)

You all like?